Acting Like A Grownup
By MMW
Chris glanced around no one was looking. He scowled. He had
thought this would be a nice way for everyone to relax after a stressful few
weeks. Instead, they were sitting here, inside the boat trying to keep dry and
warm. It was the last time he listened to Orin. "Be fun my… Hi Kaly,"
he said, his scowl turning to a smile. Chris was under strict instructions from
Buck to be cheerful to everyone and to be a gracious host. Taking a sip of his
drink Chris could only think that Buck had way too much dirt on him.
"What's up?" Kaly asked, glancing around the room.
"Just seeking a moment of peace," Chris said. Then
releasing a sigh, he began scanning the room, his eyes stopping and focusing on
something just outside one of the windows. "What the Hell?" he asked,
heading off toward whatever had caught his attention, Kaly following along
behind.
Seeing his friend leave and wanting to ensure Chris didn't
isolate himself from everyone, Buck slipped his arm around Megan's waist and
led her through the crowd, following Chris and Kaly.
Stepping outside into the lightly falling rain, Kaly saw what
had caught his attention and worked at suppressing a laugh. Standing outside
leaning over the railing and staring intently at something below were a
dripping Vin and a soggy, bedraggled looking Meredith. They wore twin looks of
absolute innocence as they turned to look at Chris.
A bowl of red tortilla chips and cookies sat on the rail
between them. Taking in the guilty expressions, Kaly's lips twitched as she
realized they'd been dropping them over the railing, most likely onto
unsuspecting victims on the lower deck. Given the rain, she suspected the soggy
chips and cookies were causing all sorts of havoc.
"Well?" Chris demanded, offering his most threatening
glare.
It had no effect upon the innocent expressions of the duo. The
glare had never really worked on Vin and, much to Chris' chagrin it worked on
neither Meredith nor her sister Megan. Still he wanted to know what the two had
been giggling - yes, honest to God giggling! - about.
"I was feeling a little trapped and wanted some air,"
Meredith offered, her face completely devoid of any duplicity.
"Couldn't stand bein' in there another minute," Vin
explained. "Just needed some space."
"Then what the Hell were you giggling at?" Chris
growled. The last thing he needed was anyone from the office causing problems.
It's not like they hadn't paid out more than their fair share of damages over
the years, but Chris just didn't want to have to deal with that today.
Clearing her throat, Kaly ventured, "I think it has
something to do with the red tortilla chips and cookies in that bowl." She
winced as she saw betrayal flash in both Meredith and Vin's eyes. Mouthing
'sorry' to them, she backed off and headed toward the door.
Suddenly looking like kids with their hands caught in the
cookie jar, Meredith and Vin looked at Chris contritely. Familiar with this
look, having seen it numerous times on the face of his son and other children
with whom he'd been in contact, he demanded again. "What were you doing
with the cookies and red chips?" he demanded.
"Vermilion," Meredith corrected.
Larabee turned his full attention to the young woman,
dumbfounded. "What?" he demanded, his voice reflecting his
incredulity.
"There not just red, they're more of a vermilion
color," she restated, her voice devoid of any fear as she corrected him.
Gritting his teeth, Chris ground out, "All right. Fine.
What were you doing with the vermilion chips and the cookies?"
"Just seein' how well they splash, Cowboy," Vin
explained. Seeing the corner of Meredith's mouth twitch upward, he struggled to
maintain his composure. Narrowing his eyes, he looked at his best friend.
"You OK, Cowboy? That vein of yours is throbbin' something fierce."
He had to actually bite his lip to keep from laughing at Larabee's expression.
"And in what were you making them splash?" he
inquired, quite sure he didn't want to know.
"There's this empty vase down there," Meredith
explained, the twinkle of mischief in her eye belying the enjoyment she was
deriving from the situation. "And with all the rain we've had today, it's
filled with water."
"And from up here it takes a bit of work to get the chips
to fall in so they actually splash instead of float," Vin finished
helpfully.
His fingers flexing at his sides as he longed for a gun with
which to shoot the duo, he looked at them and said the only thing he could.
"Stop it, now. And could you two please try to act like adults?"
Megan and Buck stepped out on deck in time to see a wicked grin
appear on Meredith's face and a mischievous glint shine in Vin's eyes.
Having missed what Chris said, Megan's eyes grew wider as she gasped,
"What did you say to her?"
Turning and seeing Buck and Megan Chris frowned in puzzlement.
"What?" he asked.
Megan looked him directly in the eye and demanded, "What
did you say to her? I know that look. I've seen that look before. What did you
say to her?"
Still baffled by the anxious demands of the young blonde, Chris
replied, "I told them to try and act like adults."
Megan let out a low groan. As baffled as Chris by Megan's
reaction, Buck just shrugged and tightened his grip on the young woman who
turned to hide her face in his shoulder.
Turning back to Vin and Meredith, Chris saw the mischievous
glint in his best friend's eyes and knew what it meant. He could only assume
Megan had seen some sort of similar sign from Meredith. Swallowing he
wondered what he was in for.
Turning and exchanging a quick look, Vin asked Meredith,
"You do not splash vermilion chips and cookie?"
Meredith replied, "I do not splash them Vin-I-Am."
"Would you, could you on a boat?" Vin asked back,
keeping with their Green Eggs and Ham parody. Choking back a laugh as
Megan released an audible groan.
"I would not, could not on a boat; I will not splash them
in the rain; I will not splash them on a yacht; not in a deluge; not in a
puddle; not in a speed boat, you let me be; I do not splash them in a bucket; I
do not splash them here or there; I do not splash them anywhere; I do not
splash vermilion chips and cookies; I do not splash them Vin-I-Am,"
Meredith ranted.
"And why don't you splash them?" Vin inquired.
Setting her face into her most disdainful look and lifting her
chin in mock disgust, she replied, "Because I am acting like an
adult."
"Oh!" said Vin. "In that case so am I." And
so saying, he too put on a disdainful look and elevated his nose. Offering
Meredith his arm, she accepted and the two wandered off, but not before
Meredith grabbed the bowl with the chips and cookies.
"Why?" Megan moaned. "Why did you have to say
that?" Turning her pleading blue eyes on the man in black, she advised in
a very serious tone, "Never, tell her to act like an adult. Never!"
Then tugging Buck's arm she drew him back inside, hoping to forget what she'd
just heard.
I've got two choices, Chris told himself. I can
kill them both, or I can find the humor in it. Pondering his options
for several seconds, he sighed deeply and decided to just forget it ever
happened, killing them would cause too much paperwork and clean-up and finding
the humor in it might actually encourage them. He did, however, make a mental
note to make sure Meredith and Vin were never left alone at an office function
without proper parental supervision. Feeling the rain begin to pick up again he
headed toward the door and hopefully slightly more sane, or at least adult
conversation.
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